2 Minute Meditation For The Monsters In Your Head by Niamh T

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Find the idea of meditation a little intimidating?

The notion that we are just a couple of minutes a day away from a calmer peaceful self is an attractive sell-no? It’s been proven that by slowing everything down we can do wondrous things for our over stimulated stressed out nervous systems. What a gift to ourselves and all we have to do is stop.

How come its so hard then to sit and do nothing? Fear probably. What the heck will I find out about myself if I sit in silence and just listen in to the internal blathering? What if I’m a hideous monster? What if I’m not doing it right? What if my legs get sore? What if I find out I’m really bored or worse,boring? What if that email I’ve been waiting for comes? I suppose I’ll wait and do it after it comes, otherwise I won’t be able to concentrate. I know, I’ll google that holiday I’ve been thinking about while I’m waiting. Better check the old bank balance first though. God I’m poor. And old. Well, old enough. Soon I’ll be too old to have children. I still can’t decide if I want more or not.

Realistically though if I want to have kids I will have to have to get pregnant this year and I can’t just have one, I’ll need two,for sure. I should talk to Bryan. What if he doesn’t want kids and I do? Will we have to split up? But I really love him. Oh there’s that email. Crap, its just a reminder about which bin goes out tomorrow.It’s the black one which is really stinky because I forgot to do it last time. God I wonder is there something medically wrong with me. It cant be normal to forget stuff all the time like I do. I ’ll make an appointment with the doctor to get a repeat on the pill and then just casually drop it in to the conversation about my forgetfulness and how its having a very real effect on my quality of life. I cant relax I’ll tell her, I’m anxious.

She might give me some pills! Why does that give me a thrill? I’ll have to talk to my therapist about that one. I suppose there could be worse things to be addicted to. I know someone who thinks that their next-door neighbour is addicted to getting her house done up. We can’t judge her for that though, that could be any of us one day. Except me, because I’m poor. Am I a narcissist? Arrghh-I AM A HIDEOUS MONSTER.

This happens to me quite a lot. It was pure accident that I figured out that even a short go on the yoga mat followed by a by just a couple of minutes of sitting quietly frequently works as a salve for my neuroses.

I am a novice with meditation but nonetheless here are a few tips that I have come across and like.

  1. Keep it short to start. Set a timer for 2 minutes, even if you can sit for longer all you have to commit to is 120 seconds. Stay as long as you like after that.
  2. Expand the length of time only after you have established the habit. So after you can sit for 2 minutes everyday for 2 weeks add another minute or 2 and then after a month of that add another couple of minutes and so on.
  3. Try to pick trigger in your day that will remind you to meditate. Maybe its first thing in the morning before anyone else gets up or last thing at night. Maybe after a tea break or before you switch on the computer. It doesn’t matter – just twin it with something you know you already do everyday.
  4. Have an open attitude when you meditate. The goal is not to banish all thoughts that arise – just observe them without judgement.
  5. My favourite – Meditation is reception. You can only put yourself in a space where meditation can happen. Meditation is something that comes – you can’t do it better by trying.

There are many different meditation techniques for you to try if you are so inclined, and there’s a whole heap of free online guided meditations and resources to read up on.



Niamh x

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